Quality beats Quantity's ass a 1000 times over.
Hell yeah! Or maybe I am not so sure either.......?
This age old debate just like Nature VS Nurture goes on and on and on....
It seems like a simple debate. On the surface, most of us would have easily chosen a side.
But if you delve deeper, there is more than meets the eye.
Some things just need a little more time and patience to grow, to flourish.
Sometimes, people too just need more time and experience to understand, to learn.
This is when 'quantity' comes into play.
(Quantity = Time) -> this shall be the equation that I will use in relation to this post. Many things, even with quality, need time to show how long the quality can last.
If something is good but it only lasts for a short while, would you still say that the quality is good then?
What if instead of something, it is someone.
If someone you knew was really nice at the start but starts to turn unpleasant after a while, would you still say that this someone is a good person?
I vote for Quality. That is only because life is unexpected.
Nothing stays the same forever or more accurately put, you can never be a 100% sure if anything would stay the same forever. The only things that last forever are hope and faith.
Those two things would then determine the fate of whatever we hope to last forever. I hope so....
Reasons for why I chose and still choose Quality:
Romance
I guess now I realized that a short relationship shouldn't be undermined because despite its short 'life expectancy', a short relationship could be as meaningful and genuine as a long term one.
In fact, if impactful enough, a short time spent with someone special could mean a lot more than a lifetime spent with someone ordinary...
Someone who is not so very special.
Well, to incorporate facts and personal experience into this debate......
I miss someone whom i spent a couple of months with way more than I miss someone whom I spent a whole year with.
I felt more connected, learnt and grew more in a few months than I did in 'that' particular year.
Bottom line:
you could love and care for someone you knew for a shorter time more than someone you had been with for a while.
Maybe the reason why you stayed so long in the wrong relationship was because you (it really is me I'm talking about actually :/) were afraid of change and not because the relationship was a good one.
The quality of a relationship or the 'experience with the other half' largely depends on the quality of the other person too. The quality of his/her character and his/her attitude towards life and others.
See, there is a difference being in love with a person for who he/she really is and then being in love with the idea of a person you want your other half to be.
And sometimes, just sometimes, you don't need a whole lot of time to sass a person out, to figure out whether he/she has a good heart. It's instinct.
Friendship
Hey hey hey! ( I don't know why but the song 'Blurry Lines" by Robin Thicke just came to my mind HAHA :D )
Quantity also comes to play here when it comes to friendships.
Friendships that I have made and sustained over my young life.
Why?
Because all my best friends come from the time when I was in school, some of which are friends I made back in primary school. When it comes to friends. I like to think of them as wine. The friendship gets better with time and age. My best friends are those who have seen me through puberty and my first love.
How awesome is that?
People that I do not need to recount my adolescent stories or embarrassing histories to.
Unlike relationships (or boyfriends), friendships are not exclusive and do not come and go (as often). Usually, 'the more the merrier' applies in friendships.
So I add on new friends as I go along in life but I always remember the old ones.
For me, the older the friendships, the more memorable and special they are because unlike relationships, I can have as many 'partners' I want.
Furthermore, friends can go for months without contact but when you hear that familiar voice again, you could yak away like it was only a minute ago when the school bell rang, indicating it was time to head home.
However, quantity could mean another thing when it comes to friendships.
Quantity=Number. The number of friends (or should I say Facebook friends) you have.
Now, here is when quantity takes a backseat. It doesn't matter how many friends you have, it only matters how many are there for you when you need them. How many whom you really feel at ease with and can have a good time with....if you think hard enough...there probably isn't that many friends you could really call friends now hey?
That is when Quality wins the race. Quality of your friends sure beats the quantity of them.
That is why friendship is like wine. The longer you have kept them, the more you can trust and enjoy them.
This is pretty straight forward.
Okay imagine this scenario:
you have been living with your parents and maybe your siblings and for some, a very adorable grandmother for a long time.
For way too long.
You start to grow up.
You become your own person.
But your parents always see you as their 'child', someone who belongs to them.
Things get a little more tensed at home, you stop communicating much with your family.
Sometimes you guys greet one another but that is it.
No more chit chats, no more movie nights.
You come home and go straight to your room.
They get on your nerves easily.
Your family members seem more like room mates than family.
Then what?
Even if you spend many hours a day in the same house, there isn't much connection or a relationship. The close proximity and quantity of time spent together is too much to bear that you start taking your family for granted.
Maybe they too are taking you for granted.
Scenario 2:
You can't take it.
You move out.
You carve your own life out of the values your parents have instilled in you and make a living out of the opportunities and resources your family has given you.
You experience the harsh reality of not having your loved ones around you.
You miss them.
You call them to say hi, to ask how they are doing (something that never happened when you were staying with them).
You stop taking your family for granted.
You make an effort to visit or check up on them.
Yeah, those times might be few what with your busy schedule and distance barrier.
But hey, at least the times you actually speak to your family feel sincere and meaningful, unlike the old routine greetings that were more of a formality than real concern.
Haven't you heard, absence makes the heart grow fonder?
It isn't really about the time spent with your loved ones, it is about how the time is being spent.
But ALL in ALL: Quality and quantity go hand in hand most of the time. One cannot really live without the other for too long. They are like a married couple. One could be stronger by itself for a while but after some time, it needs support from its other half.
Just like with Romance: it might not take very long to like someone and eventually for in love with them. But it takes time and patience to stay in love and to really understand that someone.
So I guess this is a tough one. The debate goes on. Guess it takes two hands to clap.
Disclaimer: (Yeah I am very bias, so don't just accept everything I wrote. No one experiences the exact same thing anyway. Tsk Tsk.)